The Lord has been hammering me! Each time I turn around it seems the same lessons keep reappearing. I know this must mean the Lord is trying to drill
them through my thick skull! And obviously I have a thick skull!!
I studied James at the beginning of this year with my small group and now I am on it again with my 11th and 12th grade Sunday School girls. I am also studying
Nehemiah and reading the book Unglued. Plus we do the Jesus Calling book with the kids. I know, I'll admit it, I'm a lil ADD! I can't stay focused on just
one thing. I get a little antsy! Lol! I say all that to say in some strange way, they have all intertwined and continue to break my heart (in a good way
though). I continue to see so much more of me that needs to be weeded out. In James, God is digging in my soul to help me to understand mercy and love for
others. In Nehemiah He wants me to see others the way He sees them and be broken for them. In Unglued I am learning just how unglued from Truth my
emotions can be and of course in Jesus Calling, He continues to draw me unto Himself!! Hammered!!!!!
I have really been troubled over my reaction to situations that are out of my control. I can say that I don't always react in the loving way that God would
have me to. I tend to let my frustration and anger step in especially with my kids. Does this ever happen to you? Please say I'm not the only crazy mom out
there!?!?!
For instance, I have one child that is super slow at just about everything they do. If they have to take a shower and lay out clothes for the next day that
could take up to two hours. Now, in my mind a normal person should be able to do that in about 20 minutes, so you can imagine when it takes two hours that it
seems to run poison through my veins that turns me in to the Incredible Hulk or something. I turn green and begin to scream!! (Well, maybe not the green part,
LOL). Or maybe it is knowing there is a school project due and they have five days to complete it and the day before they are begging for help because they
haven't even begun the project. How about this one, they will ask a question that two seconds prior I answered in complete and full sentences using paragraph
form. I begin to react on how dumb they must be for not just listening to me! Or maybe its that situation where you know you have to be somewhere at a certain
time and it's seems every child in the house thinks they have a million minutes to get ready! Ugh!!
I'm not sure if you are following me or not but my reactions STINK!!! I'm not good at it, at all!! And no matter how much I know about His Word and the
response I should be making in love it isn't always happening! It seems to be a failing cycle but one I intend to break with the Lords help!!
Yesterday was a perfect example. I think sometimes we learn/copy/mimic reactions from those around us. Can I get an amen? Great example of how important it is the company we keep. Because someone else reacts a certain way
we tend to react that way as well. I caught myself yesterday. As I watched one person choose to to behave in the wrong way this in turn spurred a reaction from another. I saw
one persons reaction to another's sin and I jumped on the bandwagon. My reaction could have been different, it could have been to lovingly speak Truth in this persons life but it wasn't. The end result was remorse and feeling awful! Sometimes seeing someone else react the way you always do puts things in perspective. It is sometimes easier to point out someone else's sin than it is our own (but that is a whole nother devotion). What hurts most is realizing as you watch it unfold you are guilty of that same reaction. You then begin to understand the damage you are doing to the
ones you least want to do it to.
James 1:22-25 says, "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says, anyone who listens to the word but does not do
what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But the man
who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it--will be blessed in what he
does."
Woe is me!!! I don't want to forget what God is teaching me! I don't want to forget what He is saying! I don't want to not do what He ask of me!! I want to
live in His promise of freedom and blessings!
My response to questions, statements, projects done the night before, time management, and other get under my skin moments must not get the best of me. I
must remember that the Lord desires me not to forget to love in these moments of correction or just simple calm response times. I have to not forget! Not forget
what He has taught me!
He has been asking me to respond in love and not react in frustration or anger! He has been asking me to love them more even to the point of having faith in
areas that require risk! He has been telling me to trust His Way and believe His promises!
Respond in love! Faith to Love Them More! Trust His Way! Believe His Promises!
That's a lot to not forget especially in my chaotic short attention span world! I pray that if you struggle with any of these issues that you will be encouraged
that you are not alone. The Lord desires for us to walk a little closer to Him while He weeds out the junk that doesn't belong! We hear you Lord, help us to
remember!!